Page 530 - Demo

Fools%u2019 Journey524After all, we%u2019d both learned that most illnesses and accidents had psychological components that should not be ignored.While Lynn couldn%u2019t immediately think of a reason, I hit on the answer right away. I told her it probably had to do with her twin sister, Lee. Several years earlier, Lee had been moved into a residential care facility by her daughter, who told Lynn that her mom, Lee, had developed dementia. But Lynn and I had used the words, %u201ccracked up%u201d to describe what happened to Lee. It probably wasn%u2019t the most sympathetic term to use, but the phrase now had a personal connection for Lynn with her two cracked teeth. We decided it was her subconscious mind%u2019s way of saying her relationship with Lee was still unresolved%u2014even though Lee was now dead.As we talked more about it, we realized Lynn was experiencing survivor%u2019s guilt. She felt guilty for still being alive while her twin sister was not. As a young girl, she%u2019d always tried to calm down any volatile situation at home so there wouldn%u2019t be as much yelling%u2014especially with regards to her parent%u2019s and sister%u2019s intense animus towards one another. Now, however, as the lone surviving member of her nuclear family, she was punishing herself for not having saved her sister%u2019s life. Although she%u2019d only had minimal contact with Lee over the years, Lynn was subconsciously berating herself for not saying the precise thing Lee needed to hear in order to calm her and make her feel better. Of course, there was likely nothing Lynn could possibly have uttered to relieve her sister%u2019s deep despondency, or her dementia. For years, both Lynn and I had felt that Lee had been waiting her whole life for her share of a financial windfall from their parent%u2019s estate. When that didn%u2019t happen, she quite literally lost the will to live. It took some time, but Lynn eventually understood that Lee was on her own unique path through life, and that as a sister, she had only minimal influence on her. Now, she knew for certain that she had to let Lee go%u2014completely. And she hasn%u2019t broken any more teeth. However, she was invaded by Lee several months later%u2014fortunately for the last time.%u2022%u2022%u2022%u2022%u2022